My Grandmother

(it appears that i started writing this post several months ago, but never published. here it is now!) 

My grandmother is near the end of her life and every time I have a dream about her, I wake up wondering if today is the day. She has impressively outlived pretty much all of her family members including one of her children.


Last night I got this book in the mail.


And then, of course, I had a dream about her. I was at her house with my mom (something that actually took place back in January) puttering around. At some point I remember taking a bunch of slices of watercolor paper and putting them in my suitcase (no idea). Then we were going to church in a taxi, except I had to sit outside in the back-maybe it was a pickup truck?

On my last visit back in January, I took a walk around the neighborhood and realized how close the church actually was to my grandmother's place and wondered why we almost always took the church van there rather than walked. The van never went directly there even though we were so close so it always felt so far away.

So in this dream as we arrived, there was this Japanese guy in traditional farmer clothes who at first I thought was attending the church, but he was actually there to tend the garden. We went inside and my grandmother went to sit with the other deacons or whatever they're called in the right section. I was still distracted by the gardener, but then went inside to sit next to my grandmother in the middle section. Later I realized she somehow became 2 separate people. Either that or I was actually sitting with my mother. Who knows?

For some reason I got up and went to see the gardener. He was leaving. I can't remember if I talked to him or not. I returned back to the church and a couple of people got up for me to return to my seat. Then I woke up.

So it was my typical huh? dream. One of the amusing things that happened on a trip a few years ago was how people thought I was my mother. I didn't think I looked that much like my mother. I know I do kind of sound like her, much to my annoyance. Who wants to sound like anyone else?

food i hated 15 years ago, but now love

(it appears that i started writing this post several months ago, but never published. here it is now!)

beets
asparagus
chopped liver
cauliflower
peas

my apartment conflict

The current state of my neighbor situation is making me want to move.  The bed above me gets quite the "workout" at all hours and sometimes makes me wonder if it's going to come crashing through the ceiling. I've asked this neighbor to put something under the bed like maybe a few layers of carpeting, but I guess I can consider myself ignored.

The neighbor below me has gotten an electric bass and apparently the only way to practice is to turn it all the way up so that my furniture vibrates. The neighbor to the left has a pair of bulldogs. When they fight, it feels as if the entire building is shaking. He snores rather loudly and seems content to allow the door to slam. The problem with slamming to door, aside from being extremely loud, is that the walls shake so that every other door on the floor rattles and my pictures hang crooked. The other night he put in a movie and cranked the tv up loud. I had to knock on his door 3 times to get him to turn it down (granted not very much). Somehow he seemed surprised.

The neighbor on the other side also likes to watch movies and play video games rather loudly, but sometimes really early in the morning. That is until one morning I was really fed up and banged on the wall screaming. He hasn't done it that loudly since.

But really? Is that was it takes to get people to behave civilly? I have to bang on the walls and scream? It just doesn't make sense. It should be obvious upon moving in that since the floors are concrete and the ceilings are high, noise will reverberate all over the place. Secondly, there's no escaping the fact that the walls are thin. I don't think I have especially good hearing, but I can hear pretty much anything my neighbors do. I know what part of the apartment they are in and what they are having for dinner if it's particularly smelly. The crazy woman who mistreated her dog who lived to the right of me for a year made a tomato sauce so strong I resorted to hanging plastic over the area that seemed to be exposed to prevent the smell from coming through for fear it would take up residence in my clothing. Plus she smoked.

But to me it's obvious that if you are a person who makes noise, perhaps it's better to live in a house rather than an apartment. If you are in a situation with shared walls, perhaps you should keep the volume down a bit. That if you are down the hallway and can hear noise from your apartment, perhaps you are disturbing your neighbors. That if you like to listen to music loudly, wear a pair of headphones. It's hard to me to understand how other people don't see it that way. That it's just ok to be as loud as you want any time you want regardless what the lease says.

So, I've started looking around for another place. My needs are a little bit particular, but I don't thing they're particularly luxurious:

1) commute to boston less than half an hour, or few stops
2) at least 600 square feet, preferably a loft
3) little to no carpeting, preferably concrete or wood
4) a decent amount of daylight
5) appliances made in the last decade
6) demonstrably quiet. I will even ask the person showing the apartment to go to the floor above and walk around to prove how quiet it is.
7) if on the commuter rail, then must be equal or less to what i'm paying now. If on the T then add $200 to what I'm paying now
8) a grocery store needs to be within walking distance
9) a park or beach or walking trail somewhat nearby


Every apartment that I've come across that seems suitable costs about twice what I'm paying now. I just can't spend that much and still consider myself a responsible person.

I've considered Lowell, but the commute could drive me insane and every time I need to fly really early in the morning (which is most cases), it could potentially be a very expensive ordeal to get to the airport.

One solution I've considered is bribing my neighbors to move out. It doesn't guarantee that the next person who moves in would be any quieter though. But it could be potentially less expensive than moving.

So how do you deal with your unreasonably noisy neighbors?

should be sleeping

I always feel restless before going to bed. I start to think of the 20 things I could be doing even though I am tired. It is worst on a Sunday and my neighbor's loud television isn't helping. Quiet and calm help my need to steep take over, putting off all the thoughts in my mind on hold 'til another time. It's about slowing down and accommodating the more important needs. We should all sleep more.

the water card

Several years ago I was messing around with my friend's set of Oblique Strategies cards. I pulled a card that said "water". The next day, the bathroom ceiling of my apartment caved in because there was a leak. Ever since then, I've been convinced that those cards are magical. Almost every apartment I've lived in has had some minor water issue or other. It's the strangest thing. No matter what floor, no matter what weather. Some issue pops up.

The apartment I had in Prospect Heights, Brooklyn, had a small backyard where I had to check that the drain wasn't clogged with leaves or ther debris, or else the basement (where I lived) would flood when it rained. I was generally diligent about it - well, after the first storm where I fought valiantly to get the drain unclogged. Later I discovered that there was also an issue with the street sewer that would 'cause pretty much the entire basement to flood.

Two apartments later I lived in Crown Heights where the water in the shower sometimes would suddenly turn really, really cold or really, really hot. Neither was much fun. In Texas, the ceiling above the bathtub would leak if the person living upstairs took a bath (as opposed to a shower). Since it just went down the drain of my tub, I didn't pay much attention to it. I'm lazy that way sometimes.

And now this apartment. The building has some issues due to the cheap labor used to renovate it. There's a rather interesting waterfall in the stairwell when it rains. The walls of the hallway also get rather wet, leaving damp puddles on the carpeted floor. Last night I noticed some areas on the floor that looked like water had dried. The main reason this was noticeable is the floors are epoxied concrete and I can slide around in my socks. Well I hit a rough patch. I saw that the trail of residue ended where my carpet tiles started, but the carpet didn't feel wet when I touched it. So tonight I decided to get a closer look and sure enough, when I lifted the corner, it was wet underneath!

All I can figure it with 5 straight days of super windy rain, some of it worked its way into the exterior and under the wall onto my floor. Fortunately, there was no real damage as far as I can tell so far. I'm just glad I didn't set up my sleeping area next to the windows.

Another weekend gone by

I am clinging to these last moments of the weekend even though I am tired and should have gone to bed an hour ago. The idea that time seems like it speeds up as you get old is soooooo true! Add to that the shift to Daylight Savings Time. There just isn't enough time! I need that hour now!

I didn't do a lot this weekend. Half-hearted attempts at painting some tiny watercolor faces. I walked to Lynn beach, but turned back because my legs were way too cold in the rainy wind. Such a wimp! Didn't quite get around to doing my taxes. Since I moved back to a state with state taxes, I haven't been very motivated to get them done early. I did manage to bake a loaf of no-knead bread and spent a little time on work stuff to prep for a meeting tomorrow.

Saturday I went to Liberty Tree Mall mainly to visit the eyebrow lady. She was busy when I got there so I walked back to Old Navy. I don't know why I even bother with that place anymore. The quality is so bad now. Even the clearance rack has totally lost its appeal. What was interesting though is the old Walden Books space was replaced with a comic book store called Harrison's. They didn't have anything that couldn't be bought on Amazon or elsewhere for less money, but it was just exciting to have them there as opposed to Baby Gap, for example.

I thought about stopping off at North Shore Mall on the way home, but what's the point? It's funny, when I was totally broke I wanted to go shopping all the time. Now that I'm slightly less broke, it's the biggest chore in the world and I just can't find anything appealing. The problem is I like super duper plain clothes which for some reason are really, really expensive. i guess I'll just have to save up!